i could spot artist from miles away

after yoga, looking like a hot sweating tomato, i ran into the subway to catch my bus home. As i was sitting on my train, i noticed a guy with a brush pen drawing. i was like...

'that's so cool. i wonder what he's drawing..?'

and then, i realized he was starting to draw me.... and i was like....

'that is way too cool. i need to talk to this guy!'

so i went over and introduced myself and ta da, i have a drawing!!!

i must say, this is awesome piece for someone that just met me and drew me in less than 5 minutes FLAT while i didn't even really pose. he did capture part of me in there.

you rock!

lost & found

today, i left my hat at the restaurant .

and few hours later, i left my handbag at the bar. interesting enough, i was able to run back and find it again.

it was a odd feeling. leaving things and running back to find it.

lucky for me, both of them were there and restored back to me.

lost and found was the theme of the night.

on the lighter note, had fun at the life drawing as usual.

exercised by wind in action

i was suppose to go to the office today but i woke up late.. decided that i will work at home. spent the last 3 hours cleaning my house, studio...and then, i looked outside and saw how beautiful it looked. i got my camera out and my bubble jacket and got outside to catch the world in action. yes, i can't stand jersey life but today i don't mind it so much.
i love the notion of movement in things we don't think about... but they are moving crazy today...

scary

today i have been in the office by myself while it was pouring out...
i am on the 30th floor overlooking midtown. usually, i love this view, but today it was scary as shit. now, it's dark out and i want to jet out!!!!
chicken? i am.

i let it breathe

today, while sipping korean ginseng wine, we dove into some seriously deep conversation about father and daughter.

i don't know why he reminds me a lot of my father whenever he talks about his little girl.

at the end of that conversation, i couldn't help but to tear up.

there is nothing like love. and especially when that's unconditional love.

i love you dad with all my heart.

sending the energy out there.

i love this bag!!!!

i don't think i have ever stopped anyone to ask someone about their wardrobe or bag...

but today, i couldn't help to just stop someone to ask about their bag. and no, it wasn't a girl...it was a boy. and it was in port authority.

sooj: excuse me, where did you get that bag?

mikal: i made it. you like it?

sooj: yes!!

mikal: you want it?

sooj: yes!!!!

and so he takes out his shoes and some kind of spray can in his bag and hands me this bag i had been eyeing for the past 5 minutes following him.

i can not believe he just gave me the bag right there and then... i am not even sure if he had an extra bag to put his shoes and stuff.

i was too happy with the bag, i totally blanked out.

on my way back home on bus, i was thinking about what i could've given him....i mean i had my monthly metrocard that i just purchased...or my one pair mitton that i made for sunglass case... or my drawing.... i don't know.

but i def want to give something back.

i am sure if i love his shit, he will also love my shit.

check out his stuff on his web

www.rep1.net

spring studio

once again, after work, i rushed to draw at spring studio.

there is nothing that would rather do on wed night.

thank you M for providing the place. you will truly be blessed!!!

blast from the past

today i decided out of nowhere that i was gonna see my ex for the first time in like 8 months.
and yes, i was nervous. nervous about what it was gonna be like, how was i gonna be like...and all those normal things...
and while waiting for him at the bookstore, i almost felt like jetting out but i stayed.
i pulled it thru.
and then, i saw him. and then, i was taken back because he was quite different from what i remembered him.
he looked the same but he looked so distantly different.
after having dinner with him and waiting for the subway and bus back, i was in a trance..
thinking about, what our past really means and if it really is just a dream. not even the same dream but each of our own dream.
i think so.
we remember different things. interpret different things. and learn different things.
what we go from now is also just another dream. our own little dream. how was i gonna dream this scenario was totally up to me.
i think..... i am gonna make this a funny happy caring one.
toast to that.

confession #1

freudian slip

I try not to think of it, but i can't help myself.
while working today, i blurted out his name.
i shocked myself as i am pretty sure, i shocked my collegues.
it was a moment where the truth totally revealed itself.

Dear A

i was workin on my art while A was working on her list again.

her endless to do list... but this one particular was very important to do list.

it was going to be the biggest list she will ever have to check off.

we just sat there doing our own thing while talking about boys, sex, work, food, and our life ventures....

i m too lucky to have you.

open

i don't know what my life would of been like if i haven't discovered art.

it is truly a blessing. god bless art!

after work, i rushed to spring studio again.

this is too fun.

wise trade off

lately i can't help to wonder how i got here all the sudden.

i don't remember the last time i felt this relaxed.

time does teach you all sorts of things. it's good to age. i would call this phenomena "wise trade off"

i can't wait to go draw tomorrow..... life is good.

pictures speaks thousand words...

dear j

were wolf

today i discovered another animal in town. introducing Werewolf.

he is hairy, he is strong, he is muscular and doofuS!

i love it

work in progress

we knew this time will be missed.

this moment of calmness while we anticipate what waits us.

we both knew our lives will never be the same in very short period of time.

we will both cherish the days of boredom in jersey.

words or pictures

words are beyond powerful. at least i think so.

so much more than images. and when words are tranformed into images...

it could blow me away.

let me read your thoughts. let me be part of your conversation.

could or perhaps...

came across a piece that i made on new year's eve. it's a stamp of my mind at the very hour. anyway, i thought it was cool to read it. it reads from top right down.

lately, i have been thinking of two words a lot..... could i? and perhaps....
maybe it represents that i am evolving. in any case, it's exciting to think of possibilities of life... it's as big as i dream. dream. dream. dream. BIG!

pour

it's white out. i don't think i have seen snow this whole winter. my first time seeing white covering the ground.

on my way back to jersey in bus, i was looking out on the window and was thinking about how snow demands silence. it's such a powerful thing.

i came home, sat in front of the fire place, with my ipod listening to lemon jelly and sketched another hand drawn graphic.

what else would i do with my time???

inspired

While hanging out with my friend P in brooklyn, we stopped by a record store.

flipping thru, flipping thru, flipping thru.... i saw an album cover that screamed my name.

Susan Alcorn.

not knowing what the artist sounded like.... i wanted to have her album.. i kept looking at it. i knew there was something there. i felt like it was calling my name.

so, while coming back, i stopped by the store and bought her record.

now, i don't have a record player but it really didn't matter.

this was going to be a match made in heaven.

so here is my art inspired by the cover of susan alcorn.

it's a brand new year

made some watercolors in spring studio

fun fun fun!!

new year

while in yoga, it really hit me.
what was i afraid of? why was i feeling insecure about my life...myself.
why do i always look for the future me and not the person in front of the mirror?
why wasn't i totally happy with what i was?
but i truly believe in my life...where i will end up. so....what is my issue???

i need to enjoy life more.
i am making new promise to the new year.
this is my revision.

to live more, to laugh more. to love more.

yes. love love love!!!!

invisible??

the biggest fear of my life.....well, one of the biggest fear of my life is to be invisible.
what do i mean?
today, i went to yoga after work... i went to the counter. For some odd reason, the guy at the counter could not find my name in their file... so, the guy asks me for my name and information and asked me to come back after the class. OK. i said.
after the class, i saw a big sign on the door that read, "sooj, please come to the front desk" so, i got dressed and went back to the counter.

same guy: what is your name?
me: SooJ
same guy: can i help you?
me: you asked me to come back?
same guy: you are.....
me: SOOJ!
same guy: uh,...okay. uh.... what can i help you with??

at last, the guy next to him interrupted and pointed to the door with my "name". finally, the guy asked me to rewrite my information.

for some odd reason, i couldn't pass the thought in my head that not only is this guy seriously stupid but he really couldn't recognize me. like.....Zip.
am i that plain looking????

i don't even think my name is that plain.
it really made me think.
'i really do not appreciate being nobody' was my thought of the day.

put it together

today i forced myself to stay focused. i went to yoga in the morning and to draw later. sometimes, i do think that life really hits you with curved ball.

i didn't expect things to turn the way it did but i will not lose faith in my life.

i believe my life will be great. i do.

took pictures of fireplace. i liked the idea of shape in fire.

it always does

happy moment = took picture in my studio while the sun was hitting one of the yarn thread on my desk. it looked so magical. all the little thread pieces were glowing in front of my eyes...

after work, i got a small box and started to put the last pieces of what's left at my desk. i won't be sitting there anymore after today. i sat down in front of my computer and just absorbed the moment for a while. it was quite sad empty feeling. i walked out and to the subway, to the bus station, and to the bus, to my house...just like every other day...feeling totally empty and sad. really sad and didn't see what the reason was behind all the trouble all the laughter and all everything. after dinner, feeling totally the same, i came into my studio and started coloring the yarn on my desk. just coloring, coloring, and coloring, and hoping for some great accident of art to happen... and thought to myself..

'maybe the way i feel leads me to do art. like i have no choice. would i be doing art if i was happy? would i be doing art if i wasn't feeling so sad and lonely?'

i wasn't sure if i couldn't answer or if i didn't want to answer.

either way, i left myself dumbfounded.

8th piece

i know i am not even close to finishing my 7th piece, but my head seems to be more in my 8th piece. i hope i have strength to finish tho. seems to be such monster project for me especially with this new job i am taking on.
speaking of new job, i really need to get better because with this energy source, i am going to need at least 3 powerbars a day.
today, i ran into an old friend of mine. well, at first, i avoided him. and i met him again an hour again. what the.....
is it coincidence? or was it just my destiny to have him cross my life today? was it necessary? it was so weird. for some reason, i felt like there was a reason for it. sounds crazy but i do believe in instinct. and i believe this is one. i do like to see where this leads me in this game of life.

the truth is...

maybe the source of my problem is not anyone or anything but from deep within me.
so the truth is...what is my issue with myself.
maybe it's completely natural too feel bad about me. to hate me, to love me, to pity me, to encourage me... and maybe it's time to realize that there's only one that truly matters in the end. me. i would like to start accepting myself. i want to embrace me.

life drawing

today i went to spring studio after work. this place used to be my favorite place. now, it's different and yes, sometimes, still gives me a heartache. i try not to think about it because i don't want my personal life getting in my way of continuing what i truly love.... i am going to overcome it and i am going to get myself back into drawing once again.

took a old sketch pad home and took some pictures of my colored life drawing... i hope to make tons of it more.

at last...yet, undone.

i haven't been blogging in a while...

the new year started pretty rough.. my health had gotten seriously weak.

i took a trip to the herbal doctor...

"please give me the yucky brown stuff. i want to get well.."

that's pretty much what happened.

so, yes... i am drinking the yucky herbal medicine.

my resolution for the new year..... get well physically, get well mentally, and get well financially, get well.

okay, here is my preview of 6th piece.

not completely finished since it has no birds yet.. but the background is finished....

i hope it brings magic!

let the best year begin!!!!!